Not Forgotten

"God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them" (Hebrews 6:10).

How nice it is to get a phone call out of the blue from someone in the past! I got one of those last night. He is going through a tough time, and I ministered hope and love to him. His call also meant a lot to me. It was encouraging to me to know I was not forgotten and that he turned to me for help. We are mutually beneficial to each other. I helped him. He helped me (Romans 1:12).

Sometimes, I feel forgotten. I have had friends who I thought were friends not call or check on me when I have had tremendous setbacks and crises in my life. I felt abandoned and alone. I thank God that my wife has always and is here for me.  We both have expressed to each other how lonely and forsaken we would feel if one of us died. Both of us agree that we want to go out together!  We know who our real friends are and our real friends are each other!

But out of the blue came that phone call last night. It was a good feeling to know that I have not been forgotten. That I still mattered to him. That he thought of me in his crisis. I need to feel needed. We all do.  It gives us a sense of purpose, affirmation, and belonging.

Room for Error

One of the many jobs I've had was selling cars. The sales manager was a member and regular attendee of a prominent Baptist church. He was friends with the pastor. But oh! Those morning sales meetings. He turned the air blue cussing us out. We were no good. We couldn't sell a heater to an Eskimo.  He threatened to fire the whole lot of us and hire a new sales staff. All of these blasts were interspersed with an unhealthy dose of expletives.

I would leave the sales meetings feeling like I had been knocked down by a heavy weight boxer.  My head reeled.  I'd walk around the car lot trying to clear my head and get myself together to meet, greet, and try to sell a car to a prospective customer.

Room for error?  Room for failure? Room for mistakes?  Not in this world for sure!

Has someone ever stuck you with labels like lazy, ugly, stupid, dumb, and incompetent? Sure they have!  My parents did it. My supervisors have done it. Church members did it.

Zombies vs the Easter Life

There is a fascination in our popular culture with zombies, dead people who walk.  For example, World War Z, a zombie movie, raked in $540 million making it one of 2013’s ten biggest blockbusters. Think also about DVD sales, video games, comic books, novels, Halloween costumes, zombie walks, merchandise like T-shirts, conventions and even zombie art. Zombies are worth billions of dollars. Some sources say it is a $5.74 billion industry or more! 

Why the overwhelming interest in morbid zombies?  “We’re living in very uncertain times,” says Max Brooks, who wrote the book on which the World War Z zombie film is based. “People have a lot of anxiety about the future. They’re constantly being battered with these very scary, very global catastrophes. I think they (zombies) reflect our very real anxieties of these crazy scary times. A zombie story gives people a fictional lens to see the real problems of the world. You can deal with societal breakdown, famine, disease, chaos in the streets, but as long as the catalyst for all of them is zombies, you can still sleep.”

Legendary horror and zombie film director and screen writer George Romero, observed, "We’re the living dead.”

"We're the living dead."  That's a stunning assessment of people today.

What are the characteristics of living dead zombies?  How are they like people today? 

First, the living dead stumble around. They are aimless in their wonderings and have a hard time standing erect.  With all the stress, worry, and demands placed upon us today in our culture, we stumble around like dead-people walking. It's all we can do to get through a work day, to make it to Friday, to meet the demands, standards, and regulations bureaucrats put us through.  It's enough to kill the spirit, numb the emotions, and confuse the mind. 

Zombies are lonely. They are not very social. Like the living dead, who really has close friends today who accept and understand you with all your hang-ups and dysfunction?  Relationships wither and die.  We don't have time for each other.  We are too exhausted to give compassion and empathy for another.  Instead, we  confide and hug our pets, gaze for hours into our computers, and have television as our constant companion. You can't even go into a doctor's waiting room without the TV blaring.  Who can make small talk to a fellow patient with that one-eyed monster dominating everything in the room? Loneliness is deadly. Loneliness is not just making us sick, it is killing us. Loneliness is a serious health risk. Studies of elderly people and social isolation concluded that those without adequate social interaction were twice as likely to die prematurely. The increased mortality risk is comparable to that from smoking. And loneliness is about twice as dangerous as obesity. Yes, people are lonely and not very social today. Like a zombie, we are lonely dead people walking.

Zombies are infectious. They can turn living persons into a zombie by biting them. Consider how a gloom and doom person can adversely affect another person or a group.  A critical person can infect another person too. A constantly critical boss, parent, or spouse infects another causing him/her to feel worthless and "dead" or wishing for death.

Zombies can't communicate either. They just groan and howl. Many can't talk calmly. Like zombies, all they do is scream and yell. Every little slight sets them off. They resort to cursing out the perceived offender making them feel little and of no value. How many times have you been cussed at and given the finger by another driver?  Communication is a lost art.  Zombie-like yelling are the profane bombs that leave behind wreckage and ruin.

And finally, Zombies can't love.  They feel no emotional attachments to other zombies or to living humans. It's like there is a bonding block. There is a feeling that there's something missing in life, but they don't know what it is or how to get it.  The bonding block could come from fear or past hurts. If I risk loving another, it will hurt. So, a wall forms that won't allow love to be expressed or received. It's zombie-like. Without love, we are non-loving dead people walking.

The living dead zombie is pictured as the sin dead life that the Apostle Paul appropriately describes as a spiritually dead life (Ephesians 2:5). The spiritually dead stumble around aimlessly not knowing where they are going. They have no direction or purpose for life. It's all they can do to exist and to put one foot in front of the other. They feel lonely and alienated because they are alienated from God and the loving fellowship of a safe group of believers.

The spiritually dead are infectious like a zombie that bites a living soul and turns him/her into a walking dead person. Doom, gloom, and a critical spirit spread from person to person like the flu. I've seen it's fatal bite spread in a church like a deadly gas.  Spiritual death is also passed from generation to generation in families. The Bible calls this the generational curse. (See my blog on my generational curse). Parents who are constantly critical of their children spread the infection to their children who grow up criticizing their children. It's zombie-like.

The spiritually dead can't communicate. They don't know how to relate with love, forgiveness, or assertiveness. Instead, their faces gnarl up in anger. They blame, accuse, constantly confront, and condemn. They mouth is filled with cursing instead of blessing. They become a tool of the devil seeking someone to eat just like a zombie. (1 Peter 5:8). The spiritually dead can't effectively share their thoughts and feelings. They can't converse with another without it ending in an argument. They are the walking dead.

And lastly, the spiritually dead can't love. They've hardened their hearts to the extent that they feel nothing. They are out of touch with their emotions and feelings and what feelings they do have are not authentic. Some cannot even love themselves. They are filled with self-loathing and self-hatred recoiling and lashing out at everyone like a viper. They are the walking dead unable to live and enjoy the life and healthy relationships God intends for us to have.

The Bible says it like this, "They do not understand, and they know nothing, because they refuse to listen. So they cannot have the life that God gives. They have lost all feeling" (Ephesians 4:18-19). A spiritually dead zombie-like person feels nothing. They are incapable of love. And what is love?  It is a warm positive regard for others. Something the walking dead cannot feel. Theirs is more like a cold negative iciness toward others because they are as incapable of loving as a rock is of feeling.

What is the opposite of dead walking zombies? Life! It is the Easter life lived in the same power that raised Christ from the death and the grave!

How is Easter life obtained?

By faith and only by faith does a divine-human transaction occur creating Easter life. Eugene Peterson makes this clear in his  paraphrase of Romans 10:9-10. "Say the welcoming word to God—“Jesus is my Master”—embracing, body and soul, God’s work of doing in us what he did in raising Jesus from the dead. That’s it. You’re not “doing” anything; you’re simply calling out to God, trusting him to do it for you. That’s salvation." And, the living dead become truly alive! 

God took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ (Ephesians2:4-5). You are no longer a walking dead zombie in the power grip of sin's cold grip. You become alive with God through Christ Jesus Christ (Romans 6:11).

I am alive with Easter life! The resurrected life of Christ lives in me!  That's the message of Easter. Out of the cold, dark death chamber of my soul, I have been resurrected. I now live because Christ lives in me!  (Galatians2:20).  He gives life because His Spirit lives in me!  Wow! (Romans 8:11).  I am living in the power of Jesus' resurrection. I have passed from death into life because I believe in Him. Jesus said, "Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life" (John 5:24).

This is graphically pictured in eating the bread of the Lord's Supper. The bread is the life of Christ entering my body, becoming a part of me. My blood, my mind, my hands, all of me. His life, his resurrected life lives in me!

Jesus resurrected life in me is true life.  I have His purpose. I have His mind. I have His reason to live.  To serve and worship the Father. To serve my fellow believers in love and to serve in love others who I meet and know.

I have the ministry of reconciliation to give make me alive with purpose (2 Corinthians 5:18).  Instead of alienating others by cursing them, arguing, and condemning like the spiritually dead do, I am alive to reconcile, to bring peace, to be a peace-maker, and to be an agent of reconciliation in my relationships. My life is infectious for the good life and bringing others to experience the reconciling power of  Christ. I am alive. Truly alive.

Christ is forming his image in me because His resurrection power makes me alive.  He is teaching me how to manage my temper so that I don't explode in a rage which scorches and destroys relationships and exiled to the inhospitable desert of alienation and loneliness. But thanks to the mind of Christ in me, I am learning how to live in peace with myself and with others. That's the transformational power of Christ's resurrected life in me. It's really amazing.

There is so much more to life than walking around like a dead man.  There is nothing like feeling gratitude, companionship, love, satisfaction, peace, hope, comfort, and rest. It is an incredible feeling.  It's real life. It's the power of Easter life through His resurrected power living in me.

"I want to know Christ and the power that raised him from the dead" (Philippians 3:10).

The anxieties from these crazy times we live in don't bother me. I know that I'm safe. I know I have eternal life. It's liberating and true freedom. When time runs run out for me, time will just have begun. There will be no clock. Nothing will mark off the days, weeks, or years. It will be a time that never ends in a place that Jesus prepares for me in a spiritual body robed in eternal life which will not be destroyed through sickness, pain, or death.

On that Hallelujah Day, the trumpet will sound for me.  On that day when I breathe my last breath, I shall rise, clothed in my new body, and filled with the fullness of life given to me by my loving Savior, Redeemer, and Friend. What a day!  Because of Jesus' Easter morning, I too will have my own Easter morning. My life will be completed in victory, triumph, and power over death and the grave! 

I am walking in the Easter life now. Alive! Feeling His love. Receiving and giving His blessing. Sharing life with others. Alive! Yes! Alive!

Oh! Praise His name! Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and the a Holy Ghost!  I live because He lives!  Hallelujah!

Click the link to finish your Easter devotional with Chris Tomlin singing "I Will Rise".  Or click the arrow to start the video.

 

What Good Friday Means To Me

It was my pains Jesus carried—my disfigurements, all the things wrong with me.  We thought he brought it on himself, that God was punishing him for his own failures.  But it was my sins that did that to him, that ripped and tore and crushed him—my sins! Jesus took the punishment, and that made me WHOLE!  Through his bruises I get healed.  I am like sheep who’ve wandered off and gotten lost.  I've done my own thing, gone my own way.  And God has piled all my sins, everything I've done wrong, on him, on him (Isaiah 53:3-5 Message Bible).  

There have been times when I have castigated myself. I inflicted punishment on myself to relieve the painful guilt and shame from my goof-ups. Yes, there have even been times when I hated myself. Like Elijah under the juniper tree, I wished to die.  (1 Kings 19:4).  

I criticized myself severely. I took on the role of a parent lashing out his/her child for accidentally spilling a glass of milk.  For not making his bed.  For bringing home a bad report card. For talking back or as my mother used to call it, "being sassy."  

And worse perhaps than words was the corporal punishment that went along with it sometimes. 

Then there were the times of being restricted from what I really enjoyed. I remember one time not being allowed to go and play in one of Little League baseball games. The reason for the restriction has long faded from my memory, but the feeling of regret and loss comes back to me as I write this.

Self-castigation is weird.  It's like I jumped out of myself and became a parent shaking a finger at myself and pronouncing some sort of punishment to atone for my mistakes and sins.  

And here's another strange thing. After inflicting punishment on myself, I felt better. Like I had been cleansed. Purged. I don't mean to be gross, but we all know that nauseous feeling after eating bad food or from a stomach virus and the relief brought after regurgitating. Purging gets rid of the impurities and makes us feel better physically. Self punishment made me feel relieved emotionally. 

Then, I'd vow not to do it again.  I apologized to my myself and promised myself not to do the bad thing again. But that didn't work. It's like the proverb Peter referred to about the pig returning to wallow in the mud after it had been cleaned up (2 Peter 2:22). 

I discovered that this self-punishment thing comes from those times I felt  "I'm not any good.  Worthless. Of no use to myself or anybody else.  I can't do nothing right."  It comes from a sense of unresolved guilt feelings whether from real or false guilt. It was a vicious cycle. It was an attempt to get rid of mistakes, shortcomings, and sins by my own efforts. I couldn't make that work no matter how hard I tried. Relief came temporarily but not permanently. 

I thank God that I didn't carry my self-punishment to extremes. I've known students I've taught to come to school on Mondays with fresh cuts on their arms done by their own hands. I've known kids who have pulled out their eye lashes. It seemed girls did this more than boys. Why the gender disparity? I don't know.  With boys, it seems like their self-punishment would be hitting themselves or banging their heads against the wall. Yep, I've seen that as a school teacher too.  

I'm not being self-righteous.  Far from it.  I'm just thankful for what John Wesley called "God's prevenient grace" which is revealed in God's providential care of me without me even realizing it at the time He cared for me.  

So, let me say then that I'm thankful for God and His prevenient grace in that I didn't punish myself by alcohol, drugs, or doing something like punching out a window or driving purposefully into a ditch. 

As an adult, my self-punishment was more subtle.  One thing I did to punish myself was over-eat. As a diabetic, when I over-eat, I get very lethargic and sleepy due to a spike in blood sugar. It's a nice way to take out your frustrations and punish yourself by over-eating instead of self-mutilation.

Moreover, instead of binging on alcohol to relieve the emotional pain of guilt like many do, I binged on comfort food in an attempt to absolve and clear away my guilt feelings.  

Another thing I did was to isolate. My parent-self would tell my child-self to go to his room and stay there.  In my teen years, I really identified with the Beach Boys hit song, "In My Room," written by Brian Wilson. Little did I know that that Wilson had his issues too. From my standpoint, I think he tried to redeem himself through self-punishment. He spent countless hours in his room and in bed.  He became addicted to drugs and alcohol to try and kill his pain - to punish himself for feelings of guilt. Eventually, he couldn't function for many years. 

I can't speak for Wilson, of course.  But for me, isolation was a manifestation of self-punishment after making a mistake, falling short of my self-imposed expectations or for some other failure. 

Over-eating and isolation were just two forms of several I used to punish myself for feelings of guilt that I had from a goof-up, mistake, or failure to live up to my expectations or the expectations of others.

I didn't do this stuff on purpose. It just was the way I coped. I was not self-aware and had little or no self-understanding about such things. All I knew was that it was not healthy emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. And, it certainly wasn't solving my dilemma. 

What was and is the way out of this self-punishment cycle?  The way out for me became my Good Friday.

Good Friday commemorates the pain, suffering, flagulation, beating, and humiliation of Jesus Christ.  It finally dawned on me that I was doing to myself what Jesus had done for me. 

And, what did Jesus do for me?  He took on and bore the punishment for my goof-ups, my mistakes, my sins so that I wouldn't have to punish myself. He absolved me from ALL my guilt. He cleared me of my guilt, shame, and blame that I directed at myself.  In other words, he purged my soul from what was making me nauseous and sick. 

I had to make an intentional transfer of the load of guilt (both real and false guilt) that I carried to the load of the cross He carried for me.  I continue to have to make that conscious transaction after those times I make mistakes, goof-ups, and failures. 

I found that I can't carry guilt any more than I can carry a 100 pound sack of feed. I might carry it a little ways, but I'd have to stop and start over a again and again just like I tried to stop and start over after some failure or blunder whether it was intentional or intentional. In Christian jargon, it's called sins of commission and omission.  Both bring on guilt feelings that must be reckoned with. 

These guilt feelings can be temporarily absolved by my own self-effort through self-punishment, resolutions, or promises not to do it again, or they can be cleared away by transferring them to Christ through the suffering and guilt he bore for me on His cross.

I no longer have to jump outside of myself and play the stern parent and guilty child role waiting to receive punishment for my errors.  Instead, I jump into Good Friday and by faith ask the Lord if He will add my sins to the burden of the cross He bears.  I see Him taking my heavy load, putting it on a his back, stumbling and bleeding, taking my punishment, and making it His. This transaction releases me from feelings of condemnation, guilt, and shame caused by my failures real or imagined.

I feel truly liberated. Free!  I fall to my knees and tears run down my face as I watch my Savior stumble again with the load I added to His beaten and bloody back.  I shout, "Thank you!"  He looks my way and manages to say, "You're welcome.  I love you".

I go back to Good Friday again and again.  I have to or I will resort back to the same old self-defeating pattern of self-punishment, resolutions, and failing again. 

There's something about the transaction I made on Good Friday that I can't explain. There's something about feeling clean, blameless, and free from accusation (Colossians 1:22). I don't seem to mess up as much as I used too. I don't feel the need to punish myself by doing such things like over-eating or isolating. 

What happened to me on Good Friday means life to me. He really did carry that load for me. He died that I might live and have a good life free from guilt and shame (1 Peter 2:24). 

And the wonderful, amazing thing is that you can add your load on top of mine for Jesus to carry.  Go ahead.  Make the transfer. Jesus can bear it.  He wants to carry it for you. Set yourself free and live. Then come back to your Good Friday transaction every time you mess up. Break the cruel cycle of punishing yourself for your faults. Jesus will cleanse your soul and make you whole. 

To finish this time of devotion and meditation, click this link or the arrow on the video and listen to "His Life for Mine" by the Lauren Talley. 

 

My Approval Rating

Politicians live and die by their approval rating. Approval ratings are

like a weather vane. A weather vane is an instrument for showing the direction of the wind.  If public opinion is blowing to the left, the politician will point left in order to gain approval. That's why they change their positions. Very few politicians have the courage to stand on their personal convictions of what is right and wrong.  Their positions are based on what their constituents or the public wants. They just blow with the wind!  They do this because they know that a bad approval rating dooms their chances for re-election.

Furthermore, approval ratings are based on the publics perception of how well or how poor they are performing in carrying out their tasks of voting, representing the concerns of their district, state, or nation, and being dutiful to their tasks.

We are no different than politicians. I know that I'm not.  We love and need the approval and affirmation of others. We yearn to be accepted. Approval gives us a sense of self-hood.  A feeling of belonging. Acceptance makes us valued and esteemed. It's one of our deepest emotional needs.

Like the politician, our approval and acceptance by others is based on our performance and performance history. One of the many jobs I've had in my life was working for a short time at a finance company. Loans were based on three criteria: predictability, ability, and dependability based on the client's credit history and current income. Approval for the loan could be denied if just one of those criteria did not meet the standards of the loan company.

Like qualifying standards for a loan, meeting and exceeding performance standards generally leads to acceptance and affirmation. This is true in job evaluations and also in personal relationships. Everyone has implied standards and expectations in a relationship. If the other person does not meet the implied standards, then he/she is likely to reject the other person. Just think of the marriages that end in divorce. One or both spouses feel that the other is not meeting their needs. Or to say it another way, their standards. 

Human standards are always changing just like what people expect of their elected officers. Like the wind, expectations and standards change. Job standards change. I know when I taught in the public school, the educrats had nothing better to do than sit in their ivory towers and think of more standards and more training for us to go through in order to keep our jobs. And what about the students?  Standards constantly change for them too. They have to pass this new standardized test or that new academic benchmark.  High School students need more and more Carnegie units to graduate from high school. It's maddening.

And like job and education standards change, so do expectations and "standards" change in relationships.

It seems to me that we are always lacking in performing up to the expectations of others whether it be an employer, school system, spouse, friend, or the public. There are always critics throwing darts at us.  When enough people join the dart-throwers, a person experiences rejection. 

So, it's futile to seek approval and affirmation from others to build our sense of self-worth and to feel that we are a person of value. It's like trying to catch the wind in your hand.

We have been conditioned by the world's outlook and value system for approval from the wrong sources. We are tilted towards the world's way of thinking.

It's like the Christians in Corinth. They gained their approval and significance from man. Some got their significance from Paul.  Others from Peter.  And still others from Apollos. (1 Corinthians 3:1-4). Paul considered this infantile or very immature. Why?  Because receiving our identity, significance, and approval from others is useless.

I know this firsthand. I speak from experience. I sought the approval and affirmation of anyone who I related to. Friends, colleagues, principals, students, church committees, and denominational leaders. At times, my approval rating was high. I felt on top of the mountain. I felt like SOMEBODY!  I was approved, accepted, affirmed, and the accolades poured in.

But invariably, my approval rating fell. My performance didn't meet expectations. Or, I lost my temper in front of others. Sometimes, it was my fault. One thing I found out, people's acceptance is conditional. They couldn't accept me with all my scratches and dents.  There is not much room for imperfection especially with the incessant changing of expectations and standards that were placed upon me in various relationships and jobs. During those times that I fell into the valley, I don't think I could have been elected dog-catcher if I were a politician.

During those time when my "approval rating" hit bottom, I became depressed, sulky, and misery followed me like a stalker in a dark alley.

My emotions were up and down like a yo-yo. When they were down, they were really down. When I looked up, I couldn't even see the stars. That's what happens when you base your self-worth and approval rating on the fickleness of man. It's a wretched way to live.

I thank God that He didn't give up on me. Like morning's first light, then the dawn, then the mid-morning light, and finally the noon sun shining bright, Christ slowly revealed to me the better way until He brought me into a fuller revelation of His glory.

My addiction to the world's way of gaining positive approval ratings was broken into a thousand pieces.  Christ revealed to me that my life means much more than what success and approval from others can bring. I realized that by basing my self-worth on "approval ratings" that in effect, I was saying that their approval was more highly valued by me than Jesus' love, acceptance, and approval. He forever demonstrated his love and acceptance of me through His pain, suffering, and death on the cross (Romans 5:6-8).  The cross is His reconciling act for me and you. Through the cross, he extends grace and sonship. He brings us to a Himself. 

Because of our Lord's reconciling act on the cross, I am completely acceptable to God (Ephesians 1:6) and approved by Him no matter what I do or don't do.  His standard is that He loves me regardless of my successes and failures.  And, that standard never changes. NEVER! 

I am in a love relationship with the Lord which is not determined or based on my performance.  I meet and exceed His standards not based on anything I do or don't do but because of His measureless grace. If I could measure the length, breath, and depth of the universe, I still could not measure His grace. If I could count the sands of every seashore, I still could not measure His mercy.  If the sky were paper, I would not have enough ink to write about His love for me. 

Living on the roller coaster of my approval ratings?  No more! I think I finally understand what the prophet, John the Baptist, meant when He introduced the Christ by saying, "Every valley shall be filled.  Every mountain brought low" (Luke 3:5). For me, it means whether my "approval rating" is in the valley or as high as the mountain, my emotions will always be leveled out because I have a 100 percent approval rating from the One who matters most!

Continue your devotion and worship of the Lord by listening to "I Will Run To You" by Darlene Zscheck and HillSong. Click on the link or the arrow to play it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7s2wCVcmYOU

Jesus' Generational Curse and How He Overcame It.

Jesus inherited complex problems from his dysfunctional family background. He broke His generational curse. Because of His victory, I have been able to be victorious over my generational curse too.

First, I will discuss my generational curse and then Jesus' generational curse and the victory he won over it which by faith gives me His victory over my generational curse! 

The generational curse can be described as a low hanging black cloud overshadowing my "I," my essential,self-hood. My emotional dysfunction is inherited from my dysfunctional parents who inherited it from their parents who inherited the curse of Adam. Every generation is under the curse. Every generation must choose to break the curse through the power of Christ who broke free from His generational curse.

Not only did I inherit dysfunction from my parents, but I chose to be dysfunctional and manifest it in my emotions and relationships. I can't blame them. I have to point my finger at myself. I didn't so much blame my parents as I did others just like Adam blamed Eve.

For me, I didn't understand my issues and could not heal until I first understood what they were.

I experienced so much emotional pain which led to bodily pain caused by my emotional pain and stress. My chest constricted. My head ached. My stomach churned. At one time, I was on an anti-depressant just to be able to function.

Unknowingly, I tried to kill the pain through unhealthy means which led to addictions. Then, the pain-killer became the pain producer  I tried to relieve my pain my way which is the only way I knew. It's the way my parents relieved their pain. Dad withdrew. Mom lost her temper. There are so many other ways they coped that I can't list them all. I inherited their ways of coping from them. It didn't work for them, and it didn't work for me. That's part of the generational curse.

There came a time when the pain was too much for me to bear. It drove me to seek help through counseling, group therapy, reading Christian self-help books, Scripture, and time in solitude where I did some serious thinking on who I am.

I came out on the other side healed, whole, and well. The low-lying black cloud lifted, and I saw the brilliant blue sky like those I've seen in Montana. Incredible!  I was free "from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death wrought by my generational curse and my own choices to give expression to the curse I inherited from them and from Adam. 

The power of Christ's victory over His generational curse lived in me through his Holy Spirit. I had not realized that victory until I switched on His overcoming power through faith and acceptance of who I am in Christ.  I found that salvation is more than a decision and a destiny in heaven. It is a process. The New Testament calls this "being sanctified."  

Paul expressed this power of Christ to break my generational curse in Romans 8:1-2. "With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved. Those who enter into Christ’s being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud. A new power is in operation. The Spirit of life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing you from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death" (Message Bible).  

Jesus inherited the generational curse too and overcame it. How was He cursed, and how did He overcome it?  

Jesus on earth was the God-man. He inherited his humanity from Mary. He is God through the divine seed planted in Mary's womb. Yet, He inherited His generational curse from both of His earthly parents. Yes, He inherited Joseph's generational curse too even though Joseph was not His father but rather His step-father. 

I have two biological children and a step-daughter, the daughter of my wife, whom I adopted. Believe me, she inherited my generational curse even though I am not her biological father!

The genealogy of Jesus given to us by Matthew as recorded in Matthew 1:1-16, is a Hall of Shame and not a Hall of Fame. Jesus' family tree on Joseph's side is populated with fornicators, murderers, adulteresses, prostitutes, liars, cursed kings, idolaters, and other sinners.

God did not cover up, hide, dismiss, or ignore the dysfunctional family background of His only beloved and begotten Son. It's there standing stark naked for all to see.

Out of shame and guilt, my parents taught me to hide my family's incidents of dysfunction. There were some things that others just didn't need to know about.  How about you?

Not so with God who sees all and knows all about us.  He knows what goes on and went on in our family behind closed doors.

It's not emotional healthy to keep secret the painful things that happen in our familial relationships.  I could not begin my healing process until I opened up about these issues and my own issues with a "safe" person who I could trust.  It was liberating and like a load came off my back.

From the examples in Jesus' genealogy, God showed me how to break the bonds of shame, guilt, and dysfunction in me and my family.

The Messiah's royal lineage begins with David. God did not conceal or hide David's sins and addictions. Instead, he describes his sins in excruciating detail. Look at David's addiction to sex. He committed adultery with Bathsheba even though he had several wives and many concubines who were at his beck and call. But, they were not enough. He wanted one more woman. That's the nature of addictions. He lusted for Bathsheba, a married woman even though he had a harem of women at his command.

He got Bathsheba pregnant out of wedlock.  Then he tried to cover his sin by bringing Uriah her husband, home from the front line of battle. Uriah refused to sleep with her as a tribute to his fellow soldiers who could not sleep with their wives. Then, David got Uriah drunk. That didn't work either. So, he sent Uriah back to the front line with orders to Joab, his commanding officer, to place him in a position of such danger that Uriah would be killed in battle.

In the next generation, the generational curse was passed down to his son, Amnon, who raped Tamar, his half sister.  David did nothing about it.

Then, Tamar's brother and David's son, Absalom murdered Amnon. Absalom revolted against his father and drove him from the throne. Then, Absalom met a violent, shameful death at the hands of Joab and the curse continued from there. It is difficult to believe that David is the patriarch of the family through whom God would bring the King of kings!

God doesn't hide or cover up sin. I tried to cover my sins. My parents tried to cover their sins. But sooner or later, they are going to be manifested publicly. An example from my life are the times I lost my temper in front of others.  I was exposed for who I was.  I couldn't hide it.  All I could do was apologize and promise to myself that it wouldn't happen again.  Yet, I was powerless in my own efforts to change.  The generational curse went deep into my soul.

God revealed my sins, dysfunctions, shame, and addictions to bring self-awareness through their pain for the purpose of  driving me to the cross where Jesus forgives my sins.  His love demonstrated through His shed blood on the cross covers my transgressions and releases me from the torment of shame and guilt.

God deals with me honestly, openly, and truthfully. There is no place for shame, sham, pretense, or secrecy. Confessing that I am responsible for my dysfunction opens the door for the grace, mercy, and love of Christ to work effectively in me bringing healing and wholeness to my emotions and soul.

Not only was David and his descendants from dysfunctional families and had addictions, but all the men in Jesus' genealogy had issues too.

Skipping now to the women listed in the lineage of Jesus, they too had emotional and behavioral baggage too. Take Ruth for example. She was a Moabite. The entire Moabite race was a product of incest. Lot's daughter got him drunk and had sex with him. The son born out of that incestuous affair was Moab, the father of the Moabites.

Then, there is Rahab. She was an immoral whore, idolatrous, and an outcast Gentile woman. Her story is told in Joshua 2.  Rahab was the wife of Salmon and the mother of godly Boaz who was David's great grandfather!

Did Jesus inherit the generational curse from Joseph, his step-father. Yes! The legal right to rule always came through the father's lineage. Jesus was legally Joseph's son just like my adopted daughter is legally my daughter. Jesus was legally in the royal line of David through Joseph. He had every right to rule.

The other genealogy of Jesus is recorded by Luke. Luke gives the human, biological genealogy of Christ through Mary that includes David in that family tree. Mary is not implicitly mentioned by name, but the record in Luke begins with Mary's father, Heli. Mary also has David for an ancestor.

When the genealogies recorded by Matthew and Luke arrive at David, they split with David's sons showing Nathan on Mary's side and Solomon on Joseph's side.  Thus, Jesus got a double dose of the generational curse.  He inherited it from Joseph, his step-father, and Mary, his mother. 

The genealogy of Jesus and the generational curse passed down to Him through dysfunctional families in his genealogy shows the transforming power of God's grace to break the generational curse!  Jesus broke the curse!  He inherited the sin nature but didn't sin!  He was tempted in every way that I am tempted to yield to the sin nature or the flesh as the Apostle Paul called it.

Jesus is a friend of sinners. He understood the generational curse and struggled with it too. However, he chose never to allow its manifestation in his emotions or mind and won the victory over the curse! 

What's amazing about grace is seen in David. David openly confessed his sin and was forgiven. God removed David's shame and guilt even though the consequences of his sin was passed down to succeeding generations just like in my lineage.

Each generation is responsible and each generation must break the curse through the love and forgiveness of God through Christ. 

Rahab, the harlot, became a true convert of the living God and trusted in the God to come who was Christ. 

The dysfunctional family background of Jesus strikes a knock-out blow to the face of the genealogical curse because he overcame the curse through His sinless and perfect life. I am saved by the life of Christ as well as the death of Christ. Through the death of Christ, I die to sin and the curse.  By His resurrection, I am raised a new creature with His resurrection power of the Holy Ghost living in me.  

God in His mercy through Christ does for me what I cannot do in liberating myself from my generational curse. I cannot break out of the binding chains myself.  Only Christ heals me, mends my broken life, removes my guilt,  shame, secrecy, and sham and restores my shattered hope. 

Today, I am free from the curse. My inner voice of shame that called out has been silenced!  The accusing voice that screamed, "I'm not good enough. Something is wrong with me.  I'm unworthy. I can't forgive.  I cannot be forgiven. I can't admit I did that and must cover it.  I'm rejected and not accepted. I am inadequate."

My inner voice of shame has been silenced by the deafening roar of love, acceptance, and forgiveness of Christ demonstrated by His death on the cross. He loved me. He loves me to this day. And, He will love me tomorrow.

That inner voice of shame caused me pain and almost destroyed me mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and relationally.

Now, I hear the voice that I am esteemed by God. I am His child. I am forgiven. I am a spring of living water. I am treasured and valued. I am accepted. I am a branch growing from His vine. That is what I hear. I choose to hear that voice and not the other voice. I choose life and not death. I choose to be defined by the blessing and not the curse!  I choose to focus on the redeeming power and grace of Almighty God through Christ in my life.  That's how my generational curse is broken.  That's how I am free and the only way I can remain free. 

That redeeming power and grace brought me out to live under the blue skies of peace, joy, and blessedness.

Note:  I am grateful to my friend and counselor, Rev. Roger Bennett, pastor of Overcomers Outreach Center.  His sermon, "Lesson to Be Learned from the Dysfunctional Family Background of Jesus: Breaking the Bonds of Shame" was of great help in my understanding and victory over my generational curse.

To finish this devotional, I invite you to listen and worship the Lord through this powerful song by Darlene Zschech and HillSong, "In Jesus' Name." 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVsRM55_jsE or click the arrow to play it.