Who am I? I am at rest. It was nothing I archived by my power. Rest came by the power of Christ through His grace and mercy.
Since the Lord has given me self-understanding and self-awareness of who He says I am instead of me merging my identity (my ego) into others and becoming them and therefore losing my identity, I have a great since of peace and validation. It's a wonderful feeling. The writer of Hebrews calls this entering into God's rest.
For me, the rest is an end to my struggles and the resulting stress of trying to be someone God in His providence never intended me to be. It was like He forced my "I" to be subjugated to Him. He put me in my place so that He could put me in His place, the place of His rest. Christ brought me into His place of rest when I quit "kicking against the pricks" and going against the grain.
It's been an humbling experience to go from me trying to get to the top to the reality and acceptance of being at the bottom. It took a lot of hard knocks for my "I" to die. I didn't go down easily. But when my "I" was finally given the knock-out blow, something amazing and wonderful happened! I entered God's rest. I am at rest.
Stress vanished. I no longer had to take my calm down, anti-anxiety pill. I no longer had to take my "pick-up" pill either to counter my depression. It was and is quite amazing, and my Christian doctor was happy for me. My wife said, "It's good to have you back!" Well, it's good to be back, and I have Christ alone to thank who gave me no rest until I entered His rest.
It's one thing to read and hear Jesus' words, “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly” (Matthew 11:28-29 MSG).
It's one thing to read and hear those words. It's another thing to believe His words, accept them, and be in "real rest" and to live freely and lightly.
The good Lord refused to let me rest until I followed Him into His rest and became more like Him by way of His image being formed in me.
I was stubborn going against the grain. It took a lot of painful unrest to recover my "I" and learn the rhythms of grace.
For me, His rest means that I am no longer defined by my success or failure, by praise or criticism, and whether or not I am accepted or rejected. I can just be little me knowing that I am accepted by Christ for who I am just as I am and not who I thought I should be. And that is rest. The rest Christ gives me.
His rest takes worry out of me. His rest takes stress away like a cool drink of water takes away thirst. His rest is a place of quiet repose and sanctuary full of joy and peace instead of discouragement and conflict which fostered my anger.
Who am I? I am at rest. It's a wonderful place to be. I never want to leave it, and by God's grace and mercy through Christ, I never will! Amen and amen.
