Before I understood and accepted who I am as defined by
Christ, my identity could be described as a blob. I didn't know who I was. I thought I knew my identity, but I didn't.
It's kind of like traveling on a road with a posted 45 mile per hour speed
limit.
The other day, I was traveling such
a road. I knew it was a 45 mile per hour speed limit. For some reason, I looked
at my speedometer and saw I was doing 60.
I was listening to a radio talk show and was oblivious to my speed. It
was an innocent mistake, but I was violating the law. Fortunately, I didn't get
ticketed for speeding. I slowed to 45
and activated cruise control.
Similarly, I was bee-bopping down the road of life oblivious
to who I am as defined by Christ. Thank God, Christ revealed my true identity
given to me by Him. I am now on cruise control.
Jesus said that Satan steals, kills, and destroys. The devil stole my “I.” I didn't even know it like
I didn't know I was doing 60 on a 45 mile per hour road. I knew the speed limit but didn't know it. In the same way, I knew who I was but didn't know it.
Several years ago, I had my identity stolen. I didn't know that either. I had clicked on a
link in an official looking email I thought it was from my bank. The fraudulent
message asked me to verify my account. I
clicked on the link and filled out the form.
Several days later, my wife got a phone call saying cash had been pulled
out of our account from a place in Chicago. We live in Georgia. Fortunately, a flag had gone up prompting my
bank to call us. The bank’s data showed that we didn’t make purchases or
withdrawals in Chicago. My wife told the lady that we had not never been in
Chicago. The bank lady told my wife that
our identity had been stolen. The lady
promptly changed our account number and issued us a new one. Thankfully, we were only liable for $50.
That's the way the devil stole my “I.” Sadly, most of life
passed with someone else using my “I” until Jesus called and revealed that my
identity had been stolen. He re-issued my true identity based on how He defines
me.
My identity will never be stolen again. I don't click on
links from official looking emails from any banking company. I know they are
spam and phishing for my identity. Likewise, I know the thieving schemes of the
devil to steal my identity. I won't be
fooled again!
How was my identity stolen by the devil? My identity was not secure. I was insecure. I lacked self-confidence. I
had little self-awareness of who I am. I had doubts about who I am. I was a prime candidate for the devil to
steal my “I.”
I was like a chameleon changing colors to match the
environment. My “I” was stolen because I
felt that I had to turn into who I felt others wanted me to be in order to be
accepted and please them. Psychologists label this as a people-pleasing
personality. Not good or healthy.
For example, if I perceived that they thought I was a goof,
I turned into a clown which caused them to treat me like a goof. I would crack jokes like a comedian which
seemed entertaining to them and made them happy. My purpose was to please them
and make them happy at my expense.
If they thought I had some ability to offer them and advance
their career and position, I worked my tail off to prove them right. I did anything they asked and wanted me to do
for them.
I look back to a period in my life 30 years ago. It's tattooed in my memory. This is one
incident out of many I could cite.
I greatly admired and respected my Director of Missions who
had a drive to start new Southern Baptist churches in our Baptist Association. He
would say something like, "It's the Lords will to do this or that. I
believe He wants you to do it." To
illustrate, a small church lost their pastor.
Jack wanted me to travel 30 miles to preach for and pastor that church.
Then I’d travel back to my church to preach on Sunday mornings and do all my
pastoral duties for them too. Before long, I was working almost non-stop to do
what he said was the Lord's will. Can you say, “workaholic?” After all, I wanted
to do the Lord's will. I wanted to be His good servant. My identity was such a blob that I allowed
Jack to interpret for me what the Lord's will was for me.
My “I” merged with his “I.” I became Jack in order to gain
his affirmation and acceptance.
Moreover, he heaped praise upon me. A little praise for me was like saying
"Sic 'em" to a dog." I did everything he wanted me to do. In the process, I neglected my family. But
what I didn't know then was that it was more Jack's will than the Lord's will.
Do you see how deceptive the devil was in stealing my “I?” A good man was used
to rob me of my “I.” That’s the way the devil works. He takes good and perverts
it.
